Monday, June 21, 2010

father's day

Father's Day, as you can imagine, was a little tough this year. There's going to be a lot of firsts this coming year without Phil and it started with Father's Day. I met Matt and Les and M for a nice breakfast and then we went to visit his grave. And then we hit a bucket of balls at Bonneville. Before he died, I was able to send him a quick note of how i felt about him. I'd like to think that he already knew it, but just in case.....

Dad—I don’t think I’d ever be able to express all that you mean to me. What’s happening now is almost surreal—it’s so hard to believe your time here with us is so limited. I just want you to know how much I love you and how so much of who I am is inextricably linked to you. I’m so like you in so many ways and I’m sure in ways I don’t even know. But I do know that I know the gospel because of you. I know responsibility because of you. I know hard work and loyalty and generosity and honesty because of you. I know how to show up. You embody all the things I want my life and character to reflect. I will always cherish the time we were able to spend together: BYU football in the Relief Society room, piano and choir recitals that I’m sure were sometimes painful, road trips in the station wagon and minivans, early morning seminary, vacations, mowing lawns, Spain, BBQs in Evanston, etc… etc… Dad, I will miss you terribly and wish more than anything that you could stay, but please know that your influence and impact will still be felt long after we have lost you. And don’t worry about me. Please know that I am loved and taken care of. I will be okay. I am so proud to have you as my dad and so proud to be a Johnson. Even though I have had you in my life for 30 years, it definitely isn’t enough. Thank you for everything you have done, been, taught me and shown me throughout my life. I know I can be with you again and I love you so very much. See ya soon.

Forever your kiddo,
N


HAPPY FATHER's DAY, DAD! I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU





6 comments:

Jenny N said...

Sounds like a perfect way to honor and celebrate your dad. I was thinking of you all day yesterday. Love you.

A Dunn Deal said...

stop posting these tributes. I'm tired of crying at work:)
Good day yesterday.

Emily Johnson said...

Well said, Nancy. I did my own honoring/distraction techniques in NYC with good friends, chocolate, and Yankees baseball.

Moore Family said...

Was thinking of you guys yesterday, too. Love that you hit a bucket of balls. Love you all.

Payne said...

I love you, Cheeseburger. My heart aches but you seem very at peace. What a beautiful letter to your Dad. Way to go on the Ragnar!!

Ysabelle said...

They look had fun playing golf in the field and your bonding time was really cool!



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